Monday, February 13, 2006

Cowboys and cow pies

Progress on the socks remains at a standstill, for the most part. I went to see Brokeback Mountain yesterday and it was every bit as crushing as I knew it would be. I'd read the story ages and ages ago, and am totally glad I went to see the film.

But as one friend put it: "It's like a shotgun blast to the chest."

I just hurt for the remainder of the day yesterday, and still feel really awful today. Another friend called it "a story of missed chances", and a love like that? Where it's terrible and beautiful and awful for everyone involved? I feel...hollow.

So not much progress on the socks due to extreme dents in the tissue box last night. Even trying to motivate myself by saying, "But Michelle Williams' charater was knitting! On screen!" only made me cry harder, since her situation really sucked rocks and no amount of knitting was going to make it better.

And then today I feel like I stepped in a cow pie with another knit blogger, who is lucky enough to be very wide read, and very smart and witty and funny and most of all - easily identifiable. I'm really glad she feels comfortable enough to be as open as she is with her life online. But some of us have to separate various online activities in order to feel safe-ish, which can be confusing, and can lead to the perception of multiple personalities.

The reply struck me in a pretty tender spot, whether it was meant to do so or not (I realize 'tone' is difficult to bring across well in text form), and I asked a friend if I was overreacting. She cracked me up with this comment:
How rude! I think you should tell her you're offended and now that you think about it, the rest of you are too!!

I do wonder why one of my special talents is apparently to annoy the hell out of everyone with questions, and honestly? It's been a rough 24 hours or so.

However, progress on fleece washing continues. Sig is done, Sif is almost done, and there's just a little bit of Alda left to go. There continues to be fibery goodness, just not of the Olympic variety.

If you'll excuse me, I need to go find another box of tissue.

ETA: Perhaps the comment struck the spots still tender from the movie. Many of us joke about how our knitting and/or spinning hobbies makes us 'odd' or 'different' to others in our lives. But there are plenty of things in our daily lives that we may not choose to share with others we know, for whatever reason. Sometimes the basic facts of who and/or what we love that could bring serious real-life ramifications down about our ears, from friends, family or complete strangers if they become known. At the very least this would probably be uncomfortable. The worst case scenario is something I don't want to think about.

I envy those that can be so comfortable and so open about their lives in their online. The fact that there is such a strong knitblog presence is fabulous! Great! But on the larger stage of life, knitting isn't something you're likely to get beaten up over. I, for one, am likely to take a more conservative route, even as I share what I feel I can with the public at large. Knitting is but one facet of my life that I choose to share. If the worst result of this voluntary separation of interests is confusion and the perception of "multiple personalities"?

I can live with that.


Blogger Andrea said...

I think there's nothing at all wrong with compartmentalizing, slicing and dicing your life any way you want, and presenting only what you choose to a wider public audience. And I think that is something that each blogger has to figure out for him- or herself -- how much of themselves they wish to share in their topic-specific blog. I mean, when Paul and I ended our engagement, I hesitated for a long time to even mention it in my knitting blog, because so many different people (including him) read it. But I had alluded to being engaged in the past. In the end, I did work a reference to it in there, but it was only in passing, in a sort of cataloguing of the year. And for me, that is how it should be. It's my knitting blog, not my confessional, and it's the thing that is most tied to my real-life identity. And people have had serious real-life repercussions for saying too much on blogs, so I think you're right to be cognizant and only put stuff on your blog that you feel comfortable sharing. It's your blog. I say do it however you want, and don't worry about what others think or how they would do it if they were you.

5:06 PM  

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